My motivation "video"

I am much better at typing out my feelings. I can become an emotional ball of goo when I talk about personal things. So, here is the transcript to my video that would be if I made one. I took the before pictures, just didnt make the video.


Today is the end of week one of my Power 90 transformation. I am hoping to lose weight, gain muscle and live healthier lifestyle. We don't eat all that bad to start with, but I know there is a lot of room for improvement as well. My main motivation is my kids. I have 3 beautiful babies whom are my world. I want to do this for them. My mom was overweight growing up and while I dont remember it hindering my childhood persay, I dont really have any memories of us doing anything fun together. I want to make memories with my kids that they can cherish. Not be on the sidelines while they make memories on their own. My husband is also a motivator to be healthier. I know he loves me no matter what. But I also know that I loved the way he looked at me and smiled more when I wasn't this heavy. I want to feel good about myself and I want him to be able to make me feel good again. These days I just feel like he loves me because he has to. I know thats not true but its hard not to feel that way when you are so unhappy with the way you look. I had weight issues all through school and took pills to lose it my senior year. I was a smoking size 8 for my senior prom and never felt better. I loved how I felt and I want to get back to that. Or at least as close as possible. I truly feel like I now have a food addiction and I need to relearn how to feed my body the correct way. Its like I know how, but I just cant seem to do it. I dont have the discipline. So that is one of the things I am hoping to gain from this 90 day challenge. My family really is my life. I want to do this for them and for me. Thankfully you cant see the tears running down my face. Just know that I really want to do this. More than anything right now. I have failed too many times before. Im sick of failing. I hope that the friends who will read this will help motivate me to keep going. Even when the times get hard. Thank you to my coach Suzanne for letting me into the group, giving me that extra shove to really get moving and get healthy.